I don’t usually talk about books on the blog but really thought I ought to share my latest read – Another twinkle in the eye by Elaine Hanzak. Now it’s not my usual read, I’m a sort of thriller type of girl and loved reading I Am Pilgrim recently.
As many of you are probably aware, I suffered from PTSD and PND following the birth of my daughter 20 months ago and trying to overcome it all is still a daily battle but I have the most amazing support team around me guiding me through.
Now six months pregnant with my second child naturally my thoughts are turning to the birth which I hope for one isn’t half as traumatic as the first and secondly and probably my biggest fear that the PND will return. I’ve been told it’s quite likely so that’s not really helping my mind-set to say the least.
However what I’m probably more aware of this time is perinatal depression, something I’d never heard of during my first pregnancy and I struggled with all along but never really knew. It’s really quite amazing how like Elaine describes in her book at my booking appointment with the midwife I filled in and discussed the endless questions and forms and decided this time I would state quite openly I had PND and PTSD which was noted but surprisingly brushed over in two seconds. The midwife simply asked if I was on medication – no I’m not and secondly if I’d seen someone about it, well yes the incredible guy who rescued me from this hell and is still guiding me through today. Not once did they ever question my treatment, ask to see any reports or speak to any counsellors or probe any further. In the eyes of the health system, I’m not a cause for concern. All sounds fine, no?
Well not exactly, it’s really coming to crunch time at 26 weeks into my pregnancy and I’m in pieces, clearly something isn’t right and it’s thanks to Elaine’s book that I’ve been able to pinpoint the issue and finally see that there is a reason I’m feeling like this and to understand my anxiety towards birth. Now nobody ever said a book can cure you, but it can guide you, give you hints and tips and provide the comfort of knowing you’re not alone. If anyone is struggling second time around I can’t recommend this book enough, it’s worth taking the time to read a few pages a day even just to have the knowledge and to be able to understand what’s happening and why.